Day 15- Wednesday

Today was hard because we knew we would not be going to see our daughter. We had to get everything packed up and ready to head back home. It was so weird to venture out of our guest house and into Port-au-Prince leaving behind a very big piece of our heart! Not only not being able to see our daughter, but all the kids that we have come to know.

Our day started at 4:30am (3:30 Central). We woke up (I worked out.. I know...) and then we got everything packed up. Our C4C rep read over all our paperwork and made sure we were set to go. Then we headed into Port-au- Prince. There we waited... and waited... and waited... then they finally called us up to the counter we answered a few questions and gave them all our paper work and we were done! The whole process took less than 15 minutes... the waiting probably lasted a good hour and a half.

Then they took us to the airport. We waited in the airport for a good 5 hours. Although we would have loved to go back to the creche it just didn't make any sense. It takes at least an hour to get back to Kenscoff so by the time we got there we would have to leave like 30 minutes later. We figured it was too hard for us and Benithy to do that.

As we sat there in the airport we kept thinking and talking about our little girl. Wondering what she was doing. If she realized we weren't there. I wondered what she was like when we weren't around. I suppose our friend we made will answer some of those questions for us! It just felt so weird not being there!

We loaded our plane and arrived in Atlanta. Unfortunately we missed our connecting flight to KC... which is where we are right now. Waiting to HOPEFULLY load onto this plane and get home tonight. By the time we get home tonight we'll be up for a good 24 hours.

On the flights and sitting here in the airport The Man and I talked about how weird it was to be back in the USA. We love it here. We feel so blessed to have what we have and live where we live, but we also realize how much we over use and over do. We are in a complete backward culture shock right now! :)

- We understand what those around us are saying.
- We are not stared at everywhere we go.
- The electricity stays on all the time.
- We don't have to sanitize after washing our hands
- We can see all around us (Haiti has wall EVERYWHERE.. you cannot really see beyond where you are)
- Just everything is a little bit different!

Day 14- Tuesday

Well today is probably our last day at the crèche. Today is the first day that Benithy actually approached us with a hug first. It was a good day with her. We had a lot of good quality time with her. It was another exhausting day, but it was good.  As we left The Man and I said our good-byes with the heaviness that this will probably be our last time we get to see her for a while. She treated it like every other day. She has no idea. I feel awful! Tomorrow we just won’t be there.

Tonight I sit in my room in a state of so many mixed emotions it’s hard to sort through them. I feel like I wanna cry, jump for joy, be angry, frustrated, and excited. There is no way to sum it up. Just know that we are in a hard place…. And will be until we can bring our girl home! J

Tomorrow we have a very early morning as we venture into Port-au-Prince for our ISCBR appointment. We MAY have time to go back to the crèche, but probably not. Then we head to the airport to come home! Ready or not ya’ll here we come! I think tomorrow we will be focusing on getting to see our sweet son again and sleep in our own beds!

On a side note tonight we ordered pizza from a place that one of the guys that works for C4C suggested. We got a seafood pizza… and it was AWESOME!! Really good eats! J So that was a positive for the day. 

Day 13- Monday

Today was another good day with Benithy. As soon as I swept her up she was ready to play! She talked a lot and played a lot. Then she passed out on me, and today I decided to keep ahold of her. So I rocked her for a good 1.5 hours! J

The social workers came today to ask us some questions and make sure we were suitable to adopt Benithy. It’s so hard having someone come in and evaluate you on such little information, but I think the meeting went well. There were a few weird questions in there, but for the most part really great questions.  After they interviewed us, they interviewed one of Benithy’s maids that takes care of her. Then we had to take Benithy and the other couple’s little guy into the Doctor for a check-up. We rode in the truck, the other couple, the driver, and 2 women from the crèche were also there. I had Benithy on my lap, and the couple had their son on their lap as we drove home. Benithy is awfully scared of cars and so cried for a bit. I held her tight and hummed in her ear, which usually calms her down (and it worked). Not the safest way to transport people or kids! J

Once we got home we realized we hadn’t had a chance to eat lunch, so we made our dinner and ate it up fast! We sat and chatted with the other couple for a while, and are now getting ready to call it a night.

One more day left at the crèche is all. We are there all day tomorrow and then we DO have our USCIS appointment Wednesday morning. So we are thankful that we are getting that done, but sad that we won’t get a last chance to see Benithy and the kids before we leave on Wednesday.

The best way to sum up our feelings right now is we are ready…. But SOOOOOO not ready. 

Day 12- Sunday

Today we started our morning off with church. It was a good 3 hours in a hot building with the sun literally shining down on me…. It was toasty, sweaty, and long….. but we got to see a baptism! One little boy was baptized this morning! It was done very differently because they did not use water, but they did “cover him with Christ” using a robe. It was interesting to see. Benithy slept in my lap for about 45 minutes and then spent the rest of the church playing with my Bible. She was very well behaved.

After church we walked to the crèche. It was an enjoyable walk with the kids. We got back there and Benithy was ready to go. We gave her a water bottle and that was a HIT with her! J She was showing it off. She really talked a lot today. We even started working on saying please and thank you. We played outside a lot, danced, chased, colored… we really had a great day. She really didn’t nap the rest of the day, so we really got a lot of time in with her! Hooray! A good full day. Right before we were leaving she started to get snuggly and tired. We had to go, and she was mad at us. She got real grumpy and swatted at me. The Man and I thought… I guess it’s good that she is mad we’re going and not indifferent like usual. It’s a weird thing to be kinda happy about… but we took that as SOME sort of emotion towards us! J

The other cool thing about today is I got to connect one of the kids at the crèche with his mama! I met his mom here the day we arrived they were getting ready to leave. So she messaged me and asked me to hug her son and tell her she loved him and then show him the picture. We were able to message with her a bit today and send her a picture. It was so sweet to see his face as she responded. It’s such a blessing that our adoption community can be so big, yet so small.

I can totally… yet barely believe that we are only 3 short days away from leaving. I was talking with some of the boys at the crèche today and they said, “You have 4 weeks…” I said, “I have 3 more days. Then tomorrow I have 2. Then Tuesday 1. And then Wednesday I have 0.”  And one of the boys said.. “And you cry?” and I said “Yes… I’m for sure going to cry.” And the boys said “Me too…”  So sweet!

Once we got home we ate dinner and then played some games with the other couple. It’s been fun having them here for sure.  We also got to talk with The Bash! It sounds like he is having a blast in CO right now. I really cannot wait to be able to hold him again.

Tomorrow (Monday) is our social worker visit. A social worker will come to the crèche and observe us with Benithy. Pray that all goes well. I believe they will be observing us and the other couple.

It also looks like we’ll be getting in at USCIS this trip as well. Either Tuesday or Wednesday before we fly out. 

Your prayers are being answered here. Your comments and thoughts to our family are so precious to us. Thanks again for all of you walking with us! 

Day 11- Saturday

Couple fun tidbits I keep forgetting to mention: The kids LOVE The Man’s hair a ton! They love my hair, and always ask me why I have purple in it. A couple of kids have tried to rub off my tattoo on my wrist. One kid told me NOT to wear my hair up because it made my eyes look bad! Haha.  The Man has gotten to play a lot of soccer, and most of them are shocked that he can play well! The kids walk around with baby powder on their necks after they shower. That’s how you know if a child has just bathed. Most of the kids wear crocs. This crèche is one of the best in Haiti (so we are told).

Today started off great. When we got there Benithy was up and ready to play. We took her and did play-doh with her. She loves the stuff! We also had fun with stickers. We FaceTimed The Bash today as well with Benithy. She didn’t get the concept, of course, but The Bash got to see her, and I got to see him. I simply cannot stress how much I miss that boy! Cannot wait to snuggle him! After the FaceTime we played and sang music for some of the kids. They love hearing the guitar! Then we played outside. This is where we lost The Man. He decided to play soccer, and Benithy and I played outside and with bubbles. Then we went inside and played with play-doh more until lunch. After lunch we rocked and she fell asleep (I almost did). Her nap time was a nice break, but she was asleep for a bit and I was tired myself today. I read and tried to stay occupied the most I could. The Man eventually woke her up and we played a bit before we had to go home. It was a good day with Benithy. It still kills me a bit that she really has an indifference to us coming or going.

I have to say today caught up with me. I love going to the creche and spending time with my child (of course). But to do this 8 hours a day is really catching up with me. It’s a lot of full on kid time, and there really isn’t much break from the monotony of it all. It’s nice to have the other couple because they do add some good conversations to our day, and they can empathize with how we are feeling. But we literally wake up, go to the crèche, come home, eat, MAYBE play a game, and then go to bed. So, today if I’m being completely honest with you all, caught up with me. Which is why The Man playing soccer for most of the morning didn’t bother me as much. Something different and fun for him to do and bond with some other kids is good.

Another thing I was thinking about is…. How am I supposed to go home and carry on after this experience? There is so much need from just the kids here. I can’t seem to shake the guilty feeling of just going home and carrying on with my day to day events.  I know this whole trip has changed me… I’m just trying to see how exactly it has changed in me…. If that makes sense! J

We miss you all so much. I think the closer it gets to coming home, the more we wish we could see you! 

Day 10- Friday

Friday nights don’t seem like Fridays here! J It’s the start of the weekend for most of you, but for us it’s just another day at the crèche!

Today it rained, and if you are a teacher you know first-hand that this means that the kids are CrAzY!!! We had a busy morning with “class” and then the kids made it outside to play in the dirt for a bit. Then, they went inside for bath and then play time. We took Benithy and got the play-doh out. She had such a good time with it! We played for quite a while. She really enjoys when I put music on as she plays, and every once in a while she will have to stop playing for a dance break!! Sound like anyone else you know?!?!?! J (if you don’t know… it’s all of us! The Man, Myself, and The Bash are always ready for a good break out dance moment!)

After lunch Benithy basically fell asleep for a good hour or so. This is when we played with some other kids and read. There isn’t a lot of down time there. Even as we read we are having kids come up and ask questions, take stuff from us, pick on us… So then we just give in and play. J

There was a large group of people that came through the orphanage today. They were from “Grace International” I believe an organization that helps orphanages. Anyway, they came and brought 3 big bags full of goods and toured the place. We got to talk to a few of them. They had brought over 40 bags worth of goods for orphanages all around Haiti. They go around and visit the different orphanages and bring goods for the kids! How cool is that? She said they went to a government owned orphanage earlier that day, and they had 400 boys that hadn’t eaten in three days there. They pooled their money and went and got some supplied to feed the kids for about 4 days. I’m glad there are people out there willing to do this for the kids here in Haiti!

Once we got back we were all so hungry and tired we cooked up our food, played a quick game, and we’re getting ready for bed as I type! Not a normal Friday night indeed! We need to get our energy back up for the next day though… So no time to lose! J

It looks like we WILL be getting our USCIS appointment! So that means we’ll have all of our necessary paperwork done! Then the praying begins that the process does not take too long for us to be able to come and bring her home!