Saturday, December 24, 2016

Friday- Our FInal Day

Day 5- Last Day
Today we woke up without water! So after working out I tooke a "shower" by cups of cold water! That will wake you up!!! So we're all cleanISH here! :)
After getting ourselves up, packed up, cleanISH, breakfast... We headed to the creche. B was upstairs getting her hair done! So, I got to watch how to do another hair style! Very good lessons for me. As I sat there wishing I could just take over... even though I have NO idea what I would be doing... I was thinking about how someone else gets to do my daughter's hair, wash her, dress her, provide for her... and how badly I wish it was me. Being our last day made all these thoughts come to the fore front of my mind. How I long for the days that it is ME doing all these things for my sweet girl. I would have cried right there in the baby chair if I could have... but I think the nannies already think we are crazy, and I wasn't looking to make them feel like I'm any MORE crazy! :)
ANYWAY.... After her hair was done it was breakfast, medicine, and then we went up and played in the grass. She feels the most comfortable having me let her down while we are up there. So she got down and played with her friends and it was awesome to see! I love watching how she interacts with the other kids. After a bit of too much sass we went downstairs and hung out. She wanted to chase The Bash a little bit... but mostly just ran around and then back to me. Ran around.. Then back to me.
The Bash and he best friends! He sure misses them!

B and her Friend E

Playing with a random metal bar is not out of the ordinary for them. Anything and everything is a toy....

The Grassy area is up on top of their land. It's a fun place for the kids to play!


The kids got a special treat! Sugar Cane. They let The Bash have some... he thought it was GOOD!

We had a fun surprise for us today as well. We got to meet Benito (who B is named after!) That was an awesome opportunity, and it helped us get just one more piece to B's past. It was a blessing for us for sure (and hopefully for B when she gets older).
About her normal time she snuggled in for a little nap. We sat there snuggled up for a long time. Right up until it was time to go. I tried to memorize her little face, hands... whatever I could as we sat there. Tried to imprint her smell into my head. Tried to just soak up every second I could for as long as I could.
Then... Clock striked 12:30 and it was time for us to head back to eat and finish packing up. The Bash was in tears... He was NOT ready to leave all his buddies. He was not ready to leave B. He just hates saying good-bye... I do too... but him crying helped me not to... I had to be strong for him, and so I will do my crying at another time! The Man took B up to her room to finish her nap. She clung to him for the first time this week and didn't want to let go. It was a precious moment for those two that I had been praying for.
Daddy and his Girl

The Bash not crying because he didn't want to go home. These two boys put their arms around him to console him. Such a sweet moment.

We finished our lunch and headed to the airport. The trip to the airport is quite a trip! I love the ride. The driving is mad, and the sites are amazing. It's just a great drive. This time getting to the airport was not as frightening as last time.
RIght now I sit in the plane headed to KC and my heart is torn. I'm SOOOOOO excited to be home and sleep in MY bed and have life be a little more back to 'normal.' But I long for our family to be together for forever. I dream of the days where our home is HOME to all of us. I cannot wait for our home to be filled with one sassy loud little lady. I'm excited to watch The Bash be the big brother he already is without any practice.... I just cannot wait... I'm tired of waiting... and I HATE thinking about what B is thinking right now. I pray the Lord fills her heart with His love, and that she realizes how much we truly love her.
I know a lot of you feel it too. Your encouragement and prayers continue to push us through the good days and the hard days. I got a text from my mama and it said: "I read your last blog and I cried and then couldn't sleep so I prayed all night." I said: "Ma, don't cry. We know that God is good, and we put our hope in that." As I sit and want to cry about this... I know that God is good... and that His faithfulness, love, and strength will get us through this moment and the next. May we all continue to rely on Him in each moment.... because how else would we get by?
LOVE YOU ALL!!!!

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Visit/ Bonding Trip- Day.... what day is it? OH! Day 4

The Man and I were just talking about the fact that we are 3 short days away until Christmas... but it does NOT feel like it. It's kinda funny how Haiti can do that to you. We are in a world of our own.

Today was another morning like the others.

Today when we got to the crèche B was about to get her hair done. SO I sat next to the nanny and watched her do B's hair. I'm going to need all the help I can get in that department... I can barely do my own hair (right Ashley)... let alone another person's hair! :) She sat there so patiently for a good 30-45 minutes while the nanny did her hair. I thought... if that was a kid in the US they would need an ipad or some sort of entertainment for that long of an activity. She just sat there quietly. It was a great opportunity to watch the experts go to work. While B was getting her hair done The Man was getting his hair done by a bunch of the younger kids! It looked.... SO.... good... :)

After B was ready it was food time and then medicine time. B loves for me to hold her... all.... day.... The girl is not light.. My arms are getting a GREAT workout! :) We played with B for a bit and then took her to the crèche. She, again, didn't really want to do anything. She was really shy again and wouldn't leave my side. We tried play doh and puzzles and she wanted nothing to do with it. So we played chutes and ladders. B and I were on a team (she was the spinner for our team). Then... I just sat back with her in my arms and she fell asleep and took a nice long nap. I enjoy each moment of it. I listen to her breathing and look at her cute little cheeks as they press against me. Once she woke up we colored and had some food. But B really didn't want to stay long at the guesthouse today. She wanted to head back early. So we did.

The rest of the evening we spent trying to get B to go to The Man or The Bash on her own. She wanted Mama... all.... the... time... and my arms were getting tired! :) We spent time up in the grass. There she did get outta my arms and sass around. When I say sass... I mean SASSSSSSSS! She even has a sassy walk. :) It's great. The Bash has a now declared "best friend" from the crèche. The Bash and D get along really well... and The Bash spent a lot of his time playing with D while we were there.

Time was creeping along and we were all exhausted... but it was the last 45 minutes of our time as a family that was the best. The Bash got B involved in a chase game and then The Man also joined in and we all laughed SOOOOO hard. We all played and enjoyed each other. It was a long day... but I would do it all over again for those last 45 minutes of sweet family giggles.

As we said good-bye and see you tomorrow... B ran and hid in the corner. I hate that she has to deal with these emotions... not knowing how to sort through these feelings of complete love and joy... to us leaving brings such hurt to me. I cannot wait until we no longer have to do this to her. I pray it is soon.

Not a lot of pictures from today. We just really enjoyed time together and that was that.

Tomorrow we leave back to the States. We are thrilled to be coming home to our family friends.... We are saddened that we will not be coming home as a COMPLETE family.... One day this hope will be our reality.

Continue prayers for our paperwork to go fast. Safe travels tomorrow. Strength to leave tomorrow. Comfort in leaving.

Love you all!

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Visit/Bonding Trip- Day 3

Picture from yesterday:
Time with her baby!

Brotherly love for his sister!

Cuddles with BOTH kids... :)

Organizing....

Tongues out!

Our First lunch!



TODAY:

Today was a good day. I got up and got my workout in this morning... Yes... I always work out. Getting it done in the morning (instead of the evening like yesterday) was better... but I still felt like I had never worked out before in my life. If you know me... you know I'm training for a marathon... and you know I HATE missing my runs.... GOOD THING I HAVE A GOOD DISTRACTION!! :)

The Bash woke up and "worked out" with me... He kinda just ran around me and asked me what I was doing. After 'our' workout we got ready for the day. The Man is now reading "Harry Potter" to The Bash, so they spent part of the morning reading. Then we headed over to the crèche.

B was there and came to me. She did well while we were at the crèche. We played. She actually went up to The Bash all on her own. Now, at the crèche they have a suitcase that they use to pull each other around. The Bash would say that is one of his highlights of the day yesterday... SO this picture is of B seeing what The Bash is doing... :)




After B ate her mid day breakfast/lunch we saw the nurse and then decided to head to the guest house. When we got to the guest house this time B was not really sure what she wanted to do... She didn't want to be off of my lap... she wasn't really herself... She was actually tired. So B and I sat and I sang her to sleep. She took a nice little nap this morning, and woke up in time for our second family lunch. She wasn't quite sure about any of the food today (even though it was the same as yesterday)... Once she kinda woke up we painted her nails... AND THEN she decided she would eat something. She had some food and LOVED the grapes (as she should!) Once she had some food in her belly she was AWAKE and we got going. WE did some art, played with play-doh, stacked blocks, read books, did puzzles, and just ran around. We had her at the guesthouse most of the day.


We decided it was time to walk back to the crèche so we headed back. At that time she wanted her mama to carry her everywhere. We walked back, she ate her lunch/dinner, then we looked out over the wall, and then I sat down... well that was an experience... the kids are OBSESSED with my hair. They want to know why I dyed it pink. They want to know why I cut it. They want to braid it! :) So I had about 4 boys and B all doing my hair for a good 30 minutes and The Man played soccer up on the grass with the older boys. It was a good evening. When it was time to leave B did what she had done the last time we were there. Pushed me away and acted real aloof about it all. I know it doesn't make since and it breaks my heart to leave. It breaks my heart that I can't explain it to her better. I can only imagine the hurt her heart feels as her family walks away without her. It stinks every time.


Isn't Haiti beautiful.. those are Mountains.

We came home and we are all exhausted. We had some dinner. Had some good family debrief. Watched a little movie. The Bash got ready for bed and then more Harry Potter reading.... Then we will all pass out! :)

Please continue to pray hard for our paper work.
Pray hard for B's heart and ours
Pray that tomorrow will be an awesome day (our last full day with her) where we can all feel like we got good bonding time.
Pray and Pray and Pray.

As for you all... Thank you again. I may say it every time... but I cannot stress it enough... All your love and encouragement brings us great joy as well. I pray that as you all get closer to the Christmas season that our focus can continue to look to HIM. Jesus, our Savior, born... not just born to be an amazing example and man... but born to save us all!

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

Visit/Bonding Trip- Day 2

Tuesday morning we woke up like any other morning... The Bash was awake!!! He hopped into our bed with us and talked away for a good hour (this is all normal for us). We finally got our bodies out of bed and got ready for the day. We had breakfast, I took a coldish shower, coffee, and some books. We started off our day like most other days.

We then made our way to the crèche. As soon as we got there B ran over and I got to hold her. The kids were all outside (the weather here is VERY pretty... not so much hot... more chilly) and playing. A couple of the boys have really taken to The Bash. They enjoy how funny and easy going he is (we do too). I have to take a moment to tell you that The Bash has been AMAZING through this trip so far. He has been patient, accepting, calm, sweet, hilarious..... just been a blessing to us all.

Anyway... we all played around (B in my arms). B gets heavy so I decided to sit down for a bit on a ledge. B and I started singing and I was bouncing her around on my knees and she warmed up fast (VERY different than last time... when she never wanted to come to us on her own... it took her half of the day to really warm up to us). She even went off my lap to "get" The Bash at one point. It got to the point where we felt comfortable to take her to the guest house with her. We spent MOST of the day at the guest house just us 4. It was such an awesome time...

We:
- Opened some presents (B did...)
-puzzles
-coloring
-ate lunch as a family (our VERY FIRST family meal)
-took a nap (B did... and The Man did...)
-ate Tic Tacs
-ran around the place a lot
-play doh
-blocks
-and stickers

It was an awesome day! Couple of fun things we learned: B LOVES organizing things in pairs. Everything has to be color coded and in a pair. She loves to be scared. She is smart. She is SOOOO shy at first... but once she warms up she is amazingly loud and LOVES to sing (sound like anyone else you know?!?!) B is potty trained :)

Some sweet breakthroughs: B wanted and called for ALL of us to come with her by the end of the day. She always looked for one of us if we were not all in the room together. When B was sleeping The Bash had to sit by us and snuggled next to her... I wish I could have captured the look he gave her. The Bash said many times "We're B's family" to anyone and everyone. B was sad when we had to leave (last time when we had to go... she did NOT care... so as sad as it is for her to be sad... I feel like it is good that she doesn't WANT us to go...).

No update on the case. Not sure if/when we will get anything before we leave. So keep on praying.

Can I just say how blessed we feel to have such amazing friends/family like you???? Ya'll are so encouraging to us. Your comments and investment in our family makes us feel so very loved. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!! We love you all.

Pray for paperwork, another good bonding day tomorrow, patience and energy (we are literally playing with 2 kids from 8-7.... it's exhausting... good... but exhausting), and pray that we continue to show those around us God's love.

Hope this finds you well. :)

Oh?!?! Pictures??? Yes.. here you go!





Monday, December 19, 2016

Our Visit/ 2nd Bonding: Day 1

Well today has been quite a whirlwind of a day.

We woke up at 4:00am to get to the airport. We RUSHED to get ourselves checked in and onto the plane. We had a nice flight to Miami. The Bash was scared at first, but enjoyed looking out of the window and asking "Is that the Ocean?!?" (it was never the ocean... but he asked the whole way... )

What are the odds that the same gate we came out of from our KC trip would be the same gate we would take off from Miami to Haiti?!?! In our case very very good. It was an awesome surprise to not have to run around an airport with a 6-year-old. It also gave us a few minutes to send some last texts and fill up our water bottles... Then we loaded a VERY full plane to Haiti. It was another enjoyable flight. We landed in Haiti right around 2:00 and went through customs.

It's funny how different our visit was this time from our last time. This time we knew what we were doing... We knew what to expect.... and didn't feel uncomfortable at all. Even with a crazy fight going on behind us in the airport.

WE were picked up from the airport. We stopped to pick up some fruits and veggies from the grocery store.... Now... we had been up since 4:00 am... Each plane trip I told The Bash that he should get some rest because there was a lot left of this day. He did not.... SO on the bumpiest part of our trip... The Bash... fell.... asleep!!!! Go figure. He missed the entire trip from Port Au Prince to Kenscoff. It is a beautiful drive. The ride was very enjoyable, and even though it has been over a year... it seemed so familiar and good.

We got to our guesthouse (the new guesthouse...which is actually the old crèche) around 5:00. We dropped everything off and walked over to the now new crèche to see B. We walked in and she was coming down the stairs. I think she recognized me the most because I've been able to see her and talk to her a few times on facetime. She put her hands up for me to hold her and I did not object. I drank her in! She is SOOOOOOO shy at first (kinda the opposite of The Bash). It took her a bit to warm up to The Man and The Bash... but by the time it was time for us to go, she was running around playing with us.

Starving... we left around 6:15 and headed back to the guesthouse to eat some much needed dinner. The Bash mentioned missing his home... which totally makes sense.. Haiti is a lot different... but he is enjoying himself. He has already messed around with a couple of the boy kids at the crèche and made good friends.

We look forward to another day with her. We are planning on taking her back to the guest house to spend time as a family. She is very apprehensive about new places and things... So, I hope that it is a good experience... and helps get ready to come home with us for good.

Today, we also got to talk to the C4C worker that is working on our case. He said HOPEFULLY he can work something out for our case by this FRIDAY!!! We really MAY have a back to back trip to Haiti to bring her home.

PLEASE pray that this trip is a blessing to us all. Pray for good bonding. Built up trust in us. Blessing to this country, this crèche, and these amazing kids.

Pictures are coming... Just having a hard time loading them... :)

Thursday, December 15, 2016

Family Time

We have some GREAT news... but first I want to preface this by tell you all that the reason why I haven't written much the last 3-4 months is because there has been NO MOVEMENT since then. We have not gotten any news on movement on our Birth Certificate Extract... We continue to wait. This has been a hard 6 months of waiting. We thought for sure we would be together by now.

That being said....

Our church choir decided to do a fundraiser advent dinner and dessert auction... which pushed us into making the decision to just go for it and head out there.

We are going to go to Haiti.... Monday!!!! All three of us are traveling to see our girl for the holidays... and because it's been too long since we last saw her. If she can't be here with us, like we wanted, then we are supposed to be out there!!! It will be The Bash and B's first time meeting!!! What an awesome blessing!

So, please pray that travel goes well. That this visit is a blessed one with lots of family time. That we are able to all bond and grow together. That The Bash and B get along really well.

I promise pictures and stories along the way.


ALSO, please don't stop praying for movement of the Birth Certificate. We are on our very last steps of this adoption. As soon as those papers get moved we will be able to bring her home. We're OK with going out there... then having to turn around and go get her! :)